Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Insecure Writers support group

     Here I am, putting insecurities out there.
      I've been trying to pick out an insecurity for my first Insecure Writer post.  The question "Am I good enough?"  has been plaguing my mind a lot, but that seems to be a question that bothers most new writers.  This question seeps into other areas of my life and writing though.  I have a high school degree, and I write about physics.  In this area I use the question to push myself to read as many textbooks, lectures, and essays I can on the subject.  This question drives me to find people who are also interested and can share knowledge.  This question brought me here, to see If I could prove myself in front of the largest one way mirror known to man.  It's strange, this Internet;  You can see me, I can see a reflection of me, but I can't see you.
     I'm writing this on a Tuesday night, the night usually held for my studies on thermodynamics.  The reason why I'm not is the next of my insecurities.  Focus.  After being diagnosed with Adult ADHD, I have had to develop rituals and patterns to help get things done.  Is trying to cope with this count?  I know it seems like a major hurtle for writing, jobs or a lot of things.  Ugh.  Again, it seems like I all can do is push through it keep learning to cope with it or use it to my advantage.
     I wish I was smart.  I read like crazy because I feel frustrated that I don't know everything there is to know.  The problems rise when I try to test somethings out in the real world.  Sometimes they are mechanical things, test I perform to study physical principles in the real world.  Sometimes I feel compelled to test psychological principles in the real world.  Don't feel too scared, I only try them when people put me in sales positions.  Stuff like this makes me wonder about myself.
     Yeah, I'm nothing but one big insecurity over here.  Isn't that what attracts me to writing though?  I get to show this side of myself for a change.  In the job world, if I crack and lose my confidence, I slip and fall and lose a good position to someone else. Or I lose my job to lack of control on my part.  In the relationship world, having confidence is seen to be attractive.  Here in the void though, it's wonderful.  Three people follow me.  Do they read any of it?  I don't care.  Here, it seems like I can shout until I go horse.  I'm IrishRedFox, a name and a picture.  I am a shapeless idea.
     This opening up thing?  This thing where I lay here and just write about what bothers me?  It bugs me.  I'm scared that as a writer, I no good.  As a thinker, I want to be better.  And I'm not convinced these insecure moments make me better at either.  There is no research, no experimenting happening.  Maybe taking some time to force my eye inward will help me in long run.  It's forcing me to write, after all.


  1. I think anything you 'test' in the real world - whether technical or psychological - can only help make you a better writer. I also think most great ideas come from curiosity, so keep it up!

    Welcome to IWSG! :-)

  2. I had to find out what Aristotle's Mistake was, so you are successful immediately, and I have confidence that you will do well at whatever you set out to do! I will stop in again soon!

    Peace and Grace,
    Olive Twist!!

  3. Well, heck, would you look at that. You've already doubled your following. (I'm number 6.) Joining the IWSG is a great first step to feeling better about yourself and your writing. I'm an original member, have a publishing contract and a book coming out next month, yet I'm still insecure. It's a writer thing, to be sure. All you can do is work through it and surround yourself with people just like yourself. So welcome to the IWSG! It's a great place to be!

    (One thing though, I strongly urge you to turn off your Captcha word verification. It's a nuisance, as well as a hindrance to people who want to leave a comment.)

  4. Welcome to the IWSG honey :)

    Oh honey (((((hugs))))) I'm sorry to hear about the ADHD, that must have been hard to deal with.

    Im sure you're probably aware by now that the one thing that unites ALL writers is our insecurity in our own work. Even published authors still worry that their fans won't like their new release.

    Keep writing honey :)


  5. Welcome to the IWSG!
    From what I just read, you have every chance to be a great writer as the next person. You know where you lack and are willing to do what it takes to make up for it. You will go far, my friend!

  6. Very cool that you come by to read the first timers posts.